Friendship Ceremony

Friendship Ceremony

As I mentioned in the introduction to the Road Trip, these 5 days I rate amongst the best of any time I’ve spent in Thailand. Out of all the great experiences, one stands out above the others and I know there will be tears in my eyes when I finish typing this.

Jame and Neung were definitely the spark and life of the trip. I actually know very little about them except from observations. It seemed that each has few close friends – Jame because of his learning disability and Neung because of his role of care giver to his grandmother. Maybe that’s why, as the trip progressed, the bond between them only grew stronger. They got into mischief together, they ran themselves to exhaustion together, they explored together, they sat quietly together talking and on the last night they slept together. Together happiness radiated from their faces.

On the last night the commune gathered at the command of Grandmother, Lai. We sat in a circle. The boys sat cross-legged literally bouncing in excitement. Noi whispered to me that this was a ceremony to bind the boys together in friendship. I couldn’t have been more pleased.

Lai had a loop of white thread that she lovingly passed through her hands many times as everyone gathered. Using her fingers as a ruler she cut many threads to length and twisted them together. When there was a string for everyone there, they were placed in a dish that contained significant items from each boy. Everyone waied and quietly spoke words over the dish.

Then Lai reached out and tenderly took Neung’s hand and pulled it gently into the center of the circle. Everyone around the circle then made contact with the person on either side to join the circle. I looked at Noi and tears filled his eyes as Lai placed a 10 baht coin in his son’s hand then carefully tied one of the strings around his wrist. Every member of the commune repeated this ritual with differing amounts of money placed in Neung’s hand.

Then it was Noi’s turn to tie a string to Jame’s wrist. When he was finished he turned to me and asked if I would do the same on behalf of his family. I could hardly see through my tears to tie the knot. After it seemed like a long time we all sat there, saying nothing, wrapped in the beauty of the moment.

The next day I asked Neung if he wanted me to cut off the straggling ends of string but he was definitely having nothing of that.

Two weeks later, Noi told me that plans were under way for Jame and his grandmother to visit Noi’s family in Non Tai. I told him that I would be honoured to pay for all expenses for such a visit. It’s the least I can do for being part of such a wonderful beginning