Birthday Party

Birthday

Nothing makes me smile more than joining young Thai guys in their fun and I�m happy to pay for the experience. A few nights ago one of my Thai friends was celebrating his birthday and I was asked to come along. Many jaded individuals may suggest that, in reality, it wasn�t me but my wallet which interested him. I understand this; however, if everyone plays their expected roles, I am willing to pay.

It was the birthday boy�s best friend that first reminded me that the special day was coming up. I asked what he thought the birthday boy wanted to do. Of course I got the usual answer, �Up to you�. Quickly we decided that a night out with a few of his friends would be best. I told the friend that I would give him 3000 baht and he could arrange, organize and pay for the evening. He was unsure at first but, after thinking about it, I think he was excited about that status the responsibility would bring. And I was happy not the have to worry about anything.

At 1:00am, when the bars closed, those invited gathered in front of Duc�s Caf� Bar. Many others suspected a party was in the works and were looking for an invite. A couple of good friends of mine appeared so I asked the organizer if they could come along. He agreed and I slipped him an additional 500 baht to cover their expenses.

We all jumped on a fleet of motorcycles and made our way through a sudden rainstorm up 2nd Road left on Pattaya Klang where we turned into a small soi to find a new gay disco called Dave Man Club. This is a smart looking gay disco with many handsome Coyote dancers performing around the room. The music is loud and current. Around 3:00am there�s a lip-sync show then, later, a sex show. I had brought a small cake with candles, some balloons, some glitter and a plastic tiara and wand for the birthday boy/girl � all of which created much fun and laughter. At the height of things, I counted 14 celebrants around our table.










Around 3:30am we took off to a place called TNT. It�s a small, lively, karaoke bar located one soi over from Two Guys Guest House towards 3rd Road. We were served some kind of fruit punch served in pitchers that was very tasty. We also had a half bottle of whisky left over from the disco. This was a very friendly and active place and the boys enjoyed the karaoke.







About and hour later, 8 of us made our way to a place on Soi Bongkok called Swarn (I think). It�s a series of huts over water where you can order Thai food and enjoy? more karaoke. Another bottle of whisky was ordered and some delicious food arrived. By this time the party was quite raucous and loud but a lot of fun. Once while I was dancing, I looked across the water and was surprised to see the dawn breaking. The night had passed so quickly.








By 7:00am I was tucked up in my bed with a special guy happy with the night�s events. The organizer did a great job and at no time did he come to me for additional money. That night I noticed he was at his doorman position sharing the remaining whisky with the other workers on the street.

Another great time for an old 65 year old. Thank you Thailand.

Manning the Barricades

Manning the Barricades

On this deceptively quiet Sunday afternoon in May, a small band of 3 committed and 1 pseudo revolutionaries departed the hot pleasure dome by the sea and ventured into the heart of the big mango to join thousands of compatriots. Disguised as two farang tourists with their young, innocent Thai friends from the plaza of sin, these brave men hired a taxi to carry them to the secluded meeting ground behind a particularly beautiful wat in Bangkok. The small band was lead by the nefarious Small Family Guy (SFG) from Sattahip and the world renowned Crazy Man (CM) from the foreign land of Elizabeth. A young handsome neophyte, to be henceforth known as Khun ItchyBum and his protector, the as yet uncommitted Duck, rounded out the team. This day, which started as a benign afterthought, was to prove a test to the endurance and fortitude of these men.









Arriving at the chosen wat, The Four join the constant flow of believers through the grounds of the beautiful temple and down a dusty road to the encampment. They stopped at the first tent to doff their disguises and purchase the blood shirts and clappers that would help them assimilate into the growing throng of similarly clad brethren although it was impossible for the two farangs truly hide. Nevertheless they were heartily welcomed on all sides; hailed by the men and offered wedlock by several the women. The Four easily passed through the check point and bag search. It was at this point the farangs paused to enjoy the sight of so many handsome men in uniform only to be warned by their young compatriots that these may not be friendlies and aggressive ogling should be discouraged.







A lush green plot not too close the stage was selected by Duck much to the disappointment of SFG who desired to sit as near the booming black boxes and his talking heroes as possible. The group settled down on plastic sheets to bask in the sun, await the opening speeches, enjoy the music, acknowledge the many well-wishers and be surrounded by and ever swelling red multitude. They were so enchanted that they failed to recognize the threat of gathering clouds, distant flashes of light and the many vendors hawking umbrellas.

Almost as if orchestrated by opposing powers, as soon as the first orator began to rally the crowd, the sky began to relieve itself. ItchyBum tried to accuse the leaders of another colour of using royal technology in seeding the atmosphere. Umbrellas were purchased and The Four hunkered down to wait out the 15 minute shower as proclaimed by the ever-optimistic SFG. Fifteen minutes later the heavy rain was driven sideways by a howling gale. Lightening flashed all around and crashes of thunder jolted their very souls. They huddled together while the umbrellas and plastic proved useless against such power. All around the plot of green the waters began to rise but the multitude continued to arrive. The field soon became a slough of mud 10cms deep. And still the dedicated trudged in to take up positions.







After 30 minutes the storm slackened to a gentle rain and The Four began to assess the situation. The stage was in taters. A large light standard had been blown over. No piece of clothing was dry and the stalwart CM began to declare his immense displeasure at soddened blue jeans and mud-caked shoes. He immediately began to demand where in this open field he could buy a pair of pants and some flip-flops but his whining was lost in the crowds tumultuous cheers as some brave dignitaries forsake their vehicles and strolled, unprotected, through the adoring masses to the stage. Both SFG and ItchyBum were inspired and nothing was going to move them from the spot. Duk took CM�s hand and began to lead him back through the throng on a desperate search for fresh clothes.







Back on the street there were no clothing shops to be seen but a small cafe was found that sold beer thus CM was calmed for the moment. While CM revived his courage, Duck continued the search down the soi which was packed with arriving vehicles. He managed to find a small shop where he was able to purchase flip-flops and a large pair of floral shorts. CM immediately discarded his ruined shoes but declined the gawdy shorts. Duck and CM bought some noodles and beer, waded back through the mud and rejoined the two young zealots. They sat on wet plastic under umbrellas eating their cold noodles, drinking beer listening to soaring speeches that neither farang understood. The crowd continued to grow.

All of a sudden SFG stood up and, with a manic look in his eye, declared we were to move closer to the stage. Duck tried to protest but to no avail thus the small patch of green above the sea of mud was abandoned and The Four struck out into the unknown. This decision by SFG proved the last straw for Duck. After a few minutes of trudging along behind he came to a resolute stop with mud over-topping his shoes and he refused, child-like, to proceed any further. When the others came back to him, he had decided it was time for him to return to paradise by the sea and a warm shower. The others look shocked at this display of weakness as there was still 4 more hours of speeches to go. Duck invited the other to stay but he was determined to leave. After some discussion of possibilities the four musketeers decided it was one for all and all for one and they began the slow trek back against the still arriving masses to try and find a taxi in the jammed soi.

Amazingly in all these miserable conditions, the Thai people were up-beat and friendly. After seeing TV coverage of the reds, Duck had formed opinions that were certainly dispelled by the warmth of the people he met this day.

In the taxi The Four all laughed over the day�s experiences and were happy to have taken part. Halfway home ItchyBum declared his damp jeans were causing posterior discomfort that required aggressive scratching. The 2 farangs were happy to oblige and thus ItchyBum received his nickname.

Another unforgettable time in the Land of Smiles.

Thai Guys and the Beach

I am an avid Jomtien beach person even to the point where, on very hot days, I will brave the "sparkling?" waters for a refreshing dip. I 'm usually there by 11:00am with my Bangkok Post, Ipod, books and more. I love the welcoming staff, meeting old and new farang friends, the parade of venders and the constant show the beach boys perform.

I enjoy some solitude at the beach but I also love it when one of my Thai bed partners accompanies me or meets me there but this rarely happens. Of course I understand that, at my age, what young guy wants to sit with me all day at the beach. Some will do it for money but others seem to hate the beach. Those that do come to the beach often end up sleeping the majority of the time.



Nevertheless I have found there are ways to attract boys to the beach. First I lets them know that they are always welcome to simply drop in on me while I'm there...no invite needed. I tell them they can come and eat then leave...up to them...therefore they do not feel tied to me. I provide Thai music, Thai comic books and fashion magazines for them. I tell them to bring friends if they want. On occasion I let it be known that there will be 300 Pipers on the table. Finally I have a deck of cards and a German game that the boys love.



The game can attract a crowd of beach boys who are eager to play and bet on the game. When my reluctant money boys are there, instead of them betting, I put up 100 bhat for the winner.

When the boy wants to leave, I give him taxi money and let him know how much I appreciated his company.

Where Are The Boys Now?

I often think back fondly of the boys I have met and loved in Thailand and wondered what are they doing now. I wonder if I had any lasting effect on their lives. I wonder if they’re happy.



Tas on the left         Ott on the right


I first met Ott and Tas on my 2nd holiday in Pattaya in 1990. They were two inseparable street boys who survived only because they were a team. Tas was the calm, level-headed planner and Ott was the energetic, mai-bhen-rai sanook-seeker. For many years after we met and before the current instant communication of cell-phone and internet, they intuitively knew when the wheels of my jet hit the Don Muang runway. It never took longer than 24 hours for our paths to cross. I was a butterfly but they were never very far away.

Ott was the cuter. There were many times when Ott and I shared a bed while Tas patiently waited by the Homex Inn pool. Sometimes we all shared the bed together.

Arriving in Pattaya in 1996, only Tas was there to welcome me. Ott had found a good-paying construction job in LamChabang…found enough money to buy a motorcycle…found independence. It was obvious that Tas missed his friend.

One evening Tas stood in the apartment’s doorway with a mischievous grin on his face. He stepped aside and in walked Ott…as cute as ever. To make a long explanation short, Ott slept with me that night. Why? Because Tas asked him so that Tas could ask me for a favour. Ott offered his body for his friend. Tas wanted me to pay the down payment on a motorcycle for him. Tas assured me he could manage the monthly payments, he was living free with his sister and he had a waiter’s job. How could I say no?

Needless to say, Tas’ good intentions fell apart and soon he came to me for the monthly payment. I made a deal with him. I would pay the monthly fee as long as I could use the bike during the day to go to my teaching job. He could have the bike at night and on weekends. Deal!!

One morning I discovered the bike missing….stolen. I freaked! I called the school to say I wouldn’t be there that day. I contacted the police. I went to see Tas to give him the bad news. As I walked through the hotel’s parking lot where he worked I saw the bike. He had come in the night, taken the bike and not returned it. I was furious but he assumed the Thai stance when faced with an irate farang which only made me more irate. I told him to keep the bike and have a good life. Good bye.

Since that day I have never seen Ott or Tas. They were a major part of my early days in Pattaya and I think of them often and I miss them. What are they doing now? Chock dee peuan pom.

Issan Dance - Mor Lam (Nov. 2007)

Part 1

I have been led astray and loved it. This was not a traditional Issan Dance event rather than a Rock Concert - Issan style. Starting at 7:00pm and continuing to 1:30am, the 5 or 6 bands rocked out from a very large stage, with a lot of production values before an appreciative crowd of close to 10,000. There was very little down time between bands. The venue was in the large open area on the west side of 3rd Road between Central Pattaya Road and North Pattaya Road.

We arrived at 9:30pm and stayed to past closing and I was entralled the entire time. Caringly, Neung and Sang kept asking me if I was tired...if I wanted to go...at least they would ask when I took a moment to sit down or they could move me away from the front of the stage. My normal response was, "Are you kidding?" It's been a long time since I've felt like a teenager in such an uninhibited and unjudgemental enviorment.

The event was very well organized and run. On arrival staff with flashlight directed our motorcycles to excellent parking (Bt20). The entrance fee was Bt100 (no farang mark up). Entering the grounds, we rented 4 plastic chairs(Bt20 each) much to my legs relief and I was please to see that most everyone had taken advantage of the chairs as well. Almost immediately we joined up with a group of boys we knew from Come-In bar and the beach. We placed our chairs so as to leave room for dancing - one for each of us and one to act as a table. Beer was about Bt30 or 35. All around the edges were venders selling drinks, food and amusements. Staff constantly patrolled through the crowd picking up the empties. There was a large mosh pit in front of the stage. I saw one small scuffle that was quickly and civilly handled by the police present.

If you are an old rock&roller and like to dance, the the music and the crowd will have you up and moving with increasing enthusiasm as the evening progresses and the beer takes effect. As with all Thai life, the people encourage and enjoy the participation of the elderly farang. When ever I stood up, 5 others got up and joined me.

The last band was hot! For an hour, sitting was not a lengthy option. Each song brought a huge roar from the crown as they rose as one and joined in boisterous singing. After 6 encores the entertainment ended but very few left for which I was happy. Groups sat and and enjoyed the moment almost like the calm after good sex.

On the way home we stopped at a open air Thai restaurant for a meal. We all glowed in happy exhaustion. Neung and Sang came up to my room to tuck me in and we all quickly fell asleep in a mass cuddle. Sometime during the night they left me in utter contentment. An absolutely great night!

Be warned...the next concert in on November 27th and the big one (WHAT???) is one December 5th. Watch out for the tall, balding farang in the mosh pitt...he gets a little carried away.


Part 2
Last night was another memorable evening with the people of Thailand. Neung, Sang and I attended the Issan Concert on 3rd Road which started at 7:00pm. It was quite a different stage presentation than the last. Where as the last was individual Issan rock bands playing, tonight was more a more traditional production with hundreds of performers and dancers, on a huge multilevel stage, with a large band and lavish costumes however the entertainment value was just as high. (Sorry about the spots on some of the photos - something, probably beer, got on the lens unnoticed.)




I felt sorry for Neung as he was a dancing fool at the last concert but because he had a wonky knee and taking meds due to a motorcycle accident, he was unable to dance much and could not drink beer.





We were joined by the two guys from Two Guys Guest House, Cho and Stewart. Stewart had planned on staying for a short time but 4 1/2 hours later he was still there and still amazed.





A giddy Cho was enammered by one of the star singers and he went into the mosh pitt to present her with a flower garland.





As the beer took hold and the music's tempo increased and the crowd reacted, dancing became contagious. Some crazy farangs forgot their ages and became teenagers again.











Not to be outdone by their seniors, Neung and Cho climb on their chairs and put on quite a performance....wonky knee and all.





It was one great night!! I can't wait for the next one. There is one on December 5th but unfortunately I will be back in the snows of Toronto with my memories, pictures and dreams. But I'll be back in March.



By the way, have I mentioned how much I've fallen for this guy.




Neung and Sang - Thank you for all the good times. Keet tung mak mak.
 

Boy, Did I Catch Shit Last Night (March 2008)

A large group of Farangs and many Thai boys met at Stewart's then headed off to a great Issan Concert up 3rd road. I joined them with Neung, Sang, the family guy and Goh from the beach. Everyone was in a party mood and the beer and food flowed freely. As the music and dancing was reaching manic mode, I realized I had not brought along enough money.

I quietly, unobtrusively - I thought - approached Stewart and asked to borrow Bt500 which he gave me.

Later while grabbing a bite to eat at an inexpensive Thai restaurant, I was accosted by Neung, Sang and Noi. "Did you get money from Stwart?" "Did you not think to ask us?" "Are we not your friends?" "Do you think we can't help you sometime?" And on and on it went in a very serious tone. They were truly offended.

I was thunderstruck. Then emotions brought a few tears to my eyes. It was true I never thought of asking them. I was locked in a mindspace where I see these boys as always without money.

I realize that if they truly ARE my friends then I should be more sensitive in the way I perceive and relate to them. Lesson learned in a very dramatic moment.

Ode To A Thai Guy

Ode to a Thai Guy  (June, 2008)

His arms held me tightly. His hands gently stroked my back. His words entreated me to return soon. His eyes – is that a little extra moisture there– swore me not to forget him. And then, with a gentle touching of cheek to mine and a soft sniff, the BoyGod bade farewell. He turned and hurried down the soi not wanting to see me climb into the taxi.





Bo came close with that constant, enigmatic smile. A boy of few words, so new to night world of Pattaya yet so eager. A tousled-hair, smooth skinned youth so young – too young – yet trusting enough to offer a lingering kiss on the lips. The driver impatiently revved the engine.





A strong, dark hand reached out to mine. A hand connected to a tattooed arm of sculpted lean muscle and sinew. I shook Dae’s hand and thanked him for his timely, caring friendship. In stilted English he said, “You come back soon, yes?” “As soon as I can!” I replied. A smile lit his face - handsome face. I noticed his, now bare, upper lip and wondered how great a sacrifice to his virility it had been for him to shave it after so much chirilous chiding from me. A rough persona with a beautiful aura, his hand shake was warm.





Now finally, my foundling from the street approached. Fate had brought Don and me together when, unknown at first, we both desperately needed something the other had - I in self doubt and he in medical distress. He placed his hands on my shoulders and I held his waist. His eyes met mine and he stared wordlessly, searching for some message in my face. The taxi lurched. It was time to go.





That goodbye was 94 days ago and the scene plays out vividly in my mind as if just 94 minutes ago. And in those 94 days I have never come close to touching another person like Noi, Bo, Dae or Don. Simply there is nothing like a Thai boy.

BoyGod, I hope business has been good for you and I will seek your warmth in a weeks time. Bo, you have had a birthday since I left so now our friendship can develop as far as you always wanted. Dae, the snooker table awaits and maybe this time you’ll let me win. Don, I never really got to know you well but maybe this time….

Guys……..I’m coming home!!!